First I have to brag on my kids a tiny bit. Despite being teenagers, they are good kids who make me proud. They both made straight As this last quarter, and they are involved in wholesome activities, like marching band, soccer, yearbook and dance. They’ve never done anything to break my trust, but some things make me wonder … so I ask a lot of questions. As a result, my son, 15, and my daughter, 13, recently told me I was too nosy. Is there such a thing as being too nosy when you’re a parent and your children are the object of your nosiness?
A few things that make me pause:
My son recently told me that a friend, a girl (but not girlfriend) has a nice sound system in her bedroom. Should I be suspicious?
My daughter informs me of her boyfriends though facebook. Should I be insisting that she tell me in person?
They are both voracious texters. How do other parents of teenagers feel about looking at their kids’ cell phone texts? I sneak a peek once in a while, but don’t do it openly. If I did, I imagine the nosy complaints would get much louder. AND, they’d be erasing the good stuff. So far, I haven’t found anything too shocking.
A few things that drive me nuts:
Housework. How much housework do other parents make their teenagers do on a daily basis? I find it interesting that they can remember anything related to their social life, but whose turn it is to empty the dishwasher is impossible to remember. I’m about to assign odd/even days for things, so that I can easily keep up. Anyone have any other good ideas on how to make teenagers remember household chores?
TV. Is anyone in favor of getting rid of the TV? Has anyone tried it? My husband is the biggest hindrance to this plan in our house, so it will never happen. But I remember when I was growing up, we didn’t have a TV for a while and it made me read. I might never be the reader I am, if it hadn’t been for that period of TV-lessness.
Clothes: Suddenly the consignment store clothes aren’t good enough.
Attitude. I officially know much less than they do. And I don’t dress well enough. And I’m weird about what foods they should be eating. And if I stray outside the rigid norm, I am an embarrassment.
A few things that hurt:
Volunteering at their schools is not encouraged anymore.
I’m a chauffeur now, rather than someone to do fun things with.
The dancing-around-the-house-for-fun is not something they do with me anymore.
The goodnight hugs aren’t as intense as they used to be.
But I understand … they’re growing up!
I SO appreciate the time I have left, especially when I think that:
Some 15-year-old boys signed up to fight in the Civil War.
Some 13-year-old girls were considered marriageable in eras past (perhaps in some cultures today, too).
As much as they annoy at times, I already know I’ll hate the empty nest.
But, from what I hear, there’s a good chance they’ll move back home eventually. Then I’ll be asking for advice on how to deal with adult children. LOL.
Love Trumps Logic
Available at Amazon and through Second Wind Publishing